Tag Archives: Christian

With This Ring…

Posted on by

3

A long time ago when marriage loomed on the horizon, I decided on an Picture1engagement ring. Always going against the grain, I wanted pearls instead of diamonds. Never have I been overly idealistic. I didn’t expect a fairy tale. That’s why I wanted a black pearl and a white pearl because the man marrying me would need to commit to be there for the good and the bad.

At one point I thought I’d found that man. Being an artist, he even drew up some sketches of my desired ring. In the end that all came to nothing. It’s been slow, but my heart has recovered.

During that process, life morphed into something entirely different than I expected. There’s been some good and some bad. Promising to be my husband, the Lord is sticking with me through it all.

For your Maker is your husband— the Lord Almighty is his name— the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.
Isaiah 54:5

A man may come along prepared to make that commitment. In the meantime, I asked a dear friend, Sue, to craft a ring for me.

With this ring on my right hand I’m reminded that I’m not alone. With this ring I remember I am loved and chosen. With this ring I continue living fearlessly.

IMG_20140504_185115

Why Wonderfully Unusual?

Posted on by

3

Wonderfully unusual pretty much sums up my life. The unusual is pretty obvious. I intentionally pursued motherhood as a single Christian woman. A good portion of my friends are single Christian moms. Not one of them intended to be, it’s just how things turned out. Marriage has yet to come about in my life. Still I knew God called me to be a mother. So that’s what I became. Adoption burned on my heart since childhood, but first I became a foster mom. Then went through the process of adopting. My daughters came to me 3yrs ago as foster children. Now they’re mine forever. Everything about becoming a mom – foster/adoptive – has been unusual.

I began with a nearly 13yr old. Sabrina* had been in foster care since the age of 5. I wasn’t her first foster mom but I was her last. This past summer she turned 18 and is now forging her way as an adult. Starting off parenting a teen with fetal alcohol syndrome and intellectual limitations is unusual. And it certainly was a unique experience.

The adoption hasn’t been typical either. I had to fight to keep my little ones. Their social worker was sure they’d be better off with a married couple unable to have children of their own. In no way am I opposed to infertility being a factor in people deciding to adopt. Nor am I against couples adopting. I’m all for that. But after having my girls for 1 ½ years I knew they should stay with me. A formal hearing confirmed that was the best option.

That’s not how most foster care adoption stories go. Usually a social worker calls to say, “We have a child that might be for you.” Then you hear all about them, you make a decision, you see pictures, you fall in love, and meet. Then after a month or so of visiting you take your child home. With the arrival of a letter by courier it was decreed that I would get to parent Raine & Athena forever. Not what I was expecting when I started my adoption homestudy. For some reason I thought it would be somewhat typical.

Wonderful is where we’re at now. It was a rocky start with Raine. The adoption didn’t sit well with her. That and beginning school caused her to unravel to a certain extent. Homeschooling, cutting wheat out of her diet, and some herbal anxiety medication has gotten us back on track. She’s still somewhat tightly wound, but that’s just who she is. The place we find ourselves at now is by no means perfect. But I’d venture to say it is wonderful. Through an amazing turn of events, I’m able to be a stay at home mom. My kids are my primary focus – though I am working on another dream as well (www.believebistro.com).

So, to sum up our life: it’s wonderfully unusual. Hence the new title of my blog.

Thanks for stopping by. Come back tomorrow to find out why I shouldn’t blog and cook at the same time.

*name changed

Happy Easter

Posted on by

0

But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.

Romans 8:11 (NKJV)

The same Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in my family. His power may appear, to the natural eye, somewhat less dramatic than Christ’s resurrection. But in the case of my girls, He’s brought them from death to life in a marked way. In truth, every one of us requires His resurrection. Our own hearts are dead with sin until He gains access. Thankfully, I encountered Jesus early on. The same is true of my daughters. Holy Spirit is at work in their hearts.

Raine quickly took hold of her sister when I was snapping pictures and said, WP_001125“Hug!” That is a small miracle. For a long time she’s resented Athena. But Raine’s heart is turning towards her sister as the Lord brings life to the deepest part of her.

Today my parents are taking the girls for their first sleepover. It’s been a slow process for Athena to connect to her adopted grandparents. Two weeks ago, she suddenly announced, “We should go to Grandma & Grandpa’s to sleep!” I contacted my mom and we set up a plan. When Athena realized I wasn’t going, she burst into tears. But when the time came today she couldn’t contain her excitement. With incredible joy she climbed into my dad’s truck. My mom’s promised to bring Athena home if at any point she becomes upset. I don’t think that’ll be necessary. With some time to get used to the idea, Athena is happy to go. It’s a small miracle. Where fear once resided, the Spirit is bringing confidence and courage.

I am grateful to have the Spirit who raised Christ at work in my life. I am grateful for a Saviour who brings me alive to Himself.

It stands to reason, doesn’t it, that if the alive-and-present God who raised Jesus from the dead moves into your life, he’ll do the same thing in you that he did in Jesus, bringing you alive to himself?

Romans 8:11 (The Message)

Perseverance

Posted on by

1

Daily, I choose what values are imparted to my children. Sometimes I’m intentional. When they catch me exercising – which is rare – I’m quick to say, “I want to stay healthy and keep my body strong.” Never do I hint at the fact that I need to lose weight. I want them to be comfortable with their appearance. Most of the time I am as well which is why the exercising doesn’t happen nearly enough.

I'm still committed to spring. Wearing rain boots.

I’m still committed to spring. Wearing rain boots.

There are other values I may not have been so intentional about. This week Raine’s perseverance surprised me. After a warm couple of days, snow hit us once more. We woke up to a winter wonderland again. Tuesdays are always hectic and it’s garbage day as well. Raine’s been a big help in getting the bins out. Without mitts (since I’d packed them all away), she wasn’t happy to do her job.

I opened the garage for her and got back to packing lunches. Raine returned to tell me her hands were too cold. I advised she abandon the mission then carried on getting Athena ready for school.

When we piled into the car, I discovered all the bins were out and carefully lined up along the curb. There was the regular trash, compost, paper recycling, and plastic recycling. Despite the cold, Raine had persevered.

This, by far, may be the most important value I can impart.

Praying for my girls…..

May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.

2 Thessalonians 3:5

 

Raine out for breakfast on her 6th birthday

Raine out for breakfast on her 6th birthday

Beauty for Ashes

Posted on by

0

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
    because the Lord has anointed me
    to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
    to proclaim freedom for the captives
    and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
    and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
    instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
    instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
    instead of a spirit of despair.

Isaiah 61:1-3

Adoption is an opportunity for the Lord to bring beauty for ashes. It can be difficult and messy, but there’s a distinct beauty as lives are woven together.

I have a friend who passionately advocates for international adoption. Her heart goes out to special needs children discarded because of their conditions. A great deal of factors go into that decision. It’s not as clear cut as you might think. Some families are unable to meet the financial requirements of medical care. With heavy hearts, they relinquish their child to an orphanage able to cover the costs. Whatever the reason, I don’t expect the decision is an easy one.

This week I became aware of an infant in my own country needing to be adopted. Because of his special needs, his family are unable to care for him. Canada has an exceptional government funded medical system. So it’s not the cost of medical care that’s brought these parents to this point.

Raising a child with special needs costs more than most people realize. For each family and situation the requirements vary to some degree. But without a doubt, it’s not an easy task. Perhaps this family is more realistic than most – recognizing their own limitations and reaching for something better on behalf of their child.

After a bit of investigation into the matter, I realize I’m not the parent for Male hands with babythis baby. I’m praying for the family the Lord has prepared for him. I pray their paths cross quickly and effortlessly. I pray the Lord will bind up the broken hearts of his birth family. I pray he and his adoptive family are knit together – making true, lasting connections. I pray that he is loved and able to accomplish everything the Lord has planned for him. I pray he encounters the joy of the Father who created him. Praying he is clothed in beauty as he journeys through life.