It’s been 20 days since my home opened with the local Children’s Aid. In all that time, I’ve not had one phone call. At first it was awkward being alone with my girls. Since they came to me as foster children over two years ago, there have always been other kids in the home. When I adopted them there were a few weekends when the foster children in the home were away. But we all knew they’d be back soon.

At first Sloane*, Elise*, and I waited on the edge of our seats for new foster children. But, as time’s gone on, we’ve settled into a rhythm of our own. With Sabrina* (the now 18yr old foster child who was with me 5yrs) gone some of Sloane’s hostility has lifted. Life has become manageable and enjoyable. There are still challenges and frustrations. Yet we’re coming together as a family. Immediately after Sabrina’s departure I began taking Sloane to a therapist. I was bracing myself for the worst. Overall Sloane’s coping well with the loss. She feels it – which is a good thing, a sign of healthy attachment – but it’s not crippling her.

With all my “free time” (only having my own two kids) I’ve turned my hall closet into a pantry and rearranged the kitchen.

closet turned pantry

We’ve been to the beach, raspberry picking, and to St Jacob’s market. I’m keeping up with laundry and all the little things Sabrina used to look after (in order to prepare her for adulthood). I’ve had lots of time to think about why I adopted and the life I want to create for my kids.

This time has been refreshing. I’ve been able to reorganize the house and my own thoughts. But, hopefully, the season soon changes and new foster children join us.

*name changed

Elise at the beach

Sloane with horse and bonnet from St Jacob’s